Man, I am exhausted... For this week i have been so busy.. A lot of works paper needs to be done at attachment and guess it still adding more.....Awww....One stack I completed, another stack or batch came in....sigh.. Went on site, repair analyzer. Carry and shipping it to a sixth floor.. It freaky tiring....
Yesterday, I have to paint the room. Man, luckly I have my brothers to help me out....If not, It will take me all day.... And today is the most tiring of the week.. After eating morning break, I can't sleep, so I play computer and help my mother baking tarts the whole morning. Afternoon until 3pm, I have to pick up an item, then buy and find containers for the tart, Buy my pet chincillas' food and then I have to go for FSD Training. During training, I almost suffered dehydration for it,I got headaches and almost collasped but I manage to hold it off until I got home... sigh I overworked myself too much... I hope on teachers day, I able to get a day off. If not, man... I feel like I gonna to piss off, My friends get a day off even they who having attachment too.. It a school's holiday, if they don't accept it and teacher in-charge let them be..Fuck! I been working so hard and please can I deserve a break!!
Today, I felt that I am not alone. I found someone who same pain as I did, Suffer the same fate as I did too. The loneliness he feel when she's gone. Words he used in his blog felt deep as I feel it through my heart. Even though I never met him and I always felt jealousy toward him, take him as my rival who took away my one heart & happiness but now he have the same sadness and emptiness as we both held inside. I understand now that I am not alone, even though I finally have my pieces together. Mother came back to the family, someone who cook whenever I come home where home-made foods to eat instead of just cup noodle or fast-food everyday for the past 5 years since my dearly late grandmother passed away. But still that always someone who have against my happiness, my cousins, my aunts, they will never accept my mother live with me. I know it was wrong for divorces parent to live together but I can't let my mother and stepsiblings lives in a tent again where I last found them. WHAT KIND OF SON AM I who do that!... I sometime I wish they will just buzz off... Gang up on me, telling me to get my mother out of the house. Fucked them all!. Who am I in position to do that! Sigh.... hmm.. Sometime I know what she doned in the past and some I couldn't forgive but no matter what, how much I hate her, she is after all, my mother.... She love me. I always remember when I was 12, I saw my friend's father & mother came to their child's graduation ceremony while I don't, my father is busy and I all alone and I felt jealousy toward everyone... Everywhere I go, seeing both parent with their childs, I felt anger and felt want to kill them all. Even my bestfriend by just looking at them, make me sick and my heart felt pains but I just keep a smiles.. ahhhh but what past is past, grow up without a mother since I was 7 and father always busy, teaches me to be independent, I know how to cook by myself, taught the basic by my lovely late grandmother, cook for my family. Although alone causes me miserable from the start and nobody know much of my existence but thank to a great family and few closest friends, I began slowly realises I will strive for my existence to realises. I will try to be socialize and letting go my emotions.. Thank them all..
Sigh, but yet there are more people and things that bringing me back down and I must stand to fight them. Battles had just began. To prove myself and my existence is my motto. Even pains are sometime unbearable.
For the boy who have same fate and pain inside, I wish him a happy 18th birthday and hope he strive for his goal....
"People are cruel, but cruelty is just an obstacles to be strong as long you faces your fears"
Hahaha Lately I don't why but I started back getting interested in sniper.
With One Shot, One kill Tactics
Calm and Stealth Camo Assassination
Military demoralized whenever they encounter by Snipers Coolzzz
I wishs that I can becomes a sniper, they have been my idol since my childhood But dreams hardly acheived if you have other dreams to focus on sigh.... Shit, I can't continue my father's legacy as a gold medal markman in his NS time since I have no uniform skill like e.g NCC or NPCC.., the only guns I hold in my life to shoot is a toy gun. But Maybe I can try to get a gold medal in runner for my NS just like my father used to be (Well he used to be, not now...)
Look at this picture, look the ways they wear their ghillies suit in their Camo, You hardly see them right :D and look at the kitty kat isn't its cute haha
Hi Hi Konnichiwa I been watching a lot of anime lately, haha that why long it been so long that since I have log in blogspot :D The shows are great, funny and dramatic. One of the feature anime that I wanna share is called Seto Mo Hanayome. It is typically a love comedy drama anime haha. It is about two middle schooler kids, a boy and a girl. They met together at their summer vacation’s beach, the boy is drowning, screaming for helps when nobody came to this aids. Until he about to drown near-death, he saw a beautiful girl with fishtail came to save him before he about to pass-out. He thought it was just a dream when he found himself lying on the rocks. On that night, he told his family about the incident that he was almost drowned when he was save by beautiful girl, of course his family didn’t believe him and laughed that he just making up story. But on that same night, the girl whom saved his life appeared in-front of them (freaky) and she asked him to take responsibility for his action and the boy’s parent take it as a wrong ways (you know what I means) haha. The boy and his parent were forced and dragged into their underwater lair by the girl’s bodyguards. To their shocking surprised, the girl is the pampered daughter of a Gangster Leader of the Mermen, Ojou, and the girl is really a mermaid. The father loves and do anything for his daugther. In their own mermen’s law that any mermen or mermaids ever exposed their existences to the human will brought shame to their clan and must be sentenced to death as betrayal or the exposed human must dies in order to keep the secret of their existences. But their clan’s councils decides to put it in another way that the boy must married the girl as long the boy is part of the family and the laws will have no effect on them. So he had no choice that he doesn’t want to die yet, so he accepted the offer. But the girl’s father decided to change his mind the last minute and want to kill the boy instead even though he is the one who make the offer as he think the boy isn't good enough for his precious daughter but he was stopped by his wife and his daughter and demanded him to keep his words. So the father had a plan, since he can’t touch him but his follower can. Hahaha so the boy have to fight for his life everyday, soon he began to have feeling for the girl as she is kind, gentle and understanding towards him as her future husband and constantly saving his life whenever he’s in trouble. hahaha Well typically it's hard to explain as sometime the show came to certain complication. Hahaha but it was seriously funny but it have some pervertions ;P The boy have to dealt with his two life daily, One as a newly junior high schooler which he already have a lot of werid friends to handle wth and constant danger, event, love-life on his mermens problem counter-part sigh I like the music video. Esp the lyrics "Watashi wa Romantikku!, Anata mo Romantikku!" So cute [translate: I am so Romantic!, You are also Romantic!] :D
This video took recently 2 months ago..With a new members and mentor, we called him Abang SufiYan, he taught us how to train up to all new levels. Abang sufiyan is a 22 years old, 6 years gym work-out veteran, we met him at gym every sundays everytime and he was impressed with us on how we trains and he wants to train us and put it to a test of challenges. Abang sufiyan had finished his NS last years and he wants to share his experiences with us.
We have more video but I only wants to put up the best into this blog.. This video features(left-right)Abang Sufiyan, Armans and Narzeen doing chest dips. They doing normal chest dip, cycle chest dip and final press chest dip.
Yesterday was my NS medical Check-up. I must say it quite long but it worthy. I can't wait to know where they gonna place me. A lot of tests that have doned and finally it ends. I should get "pes A or B" but instead I 'pes D' for further investigation for I have heart and chest problem, They say I have an adnormal heart trends when they scan me. And what piss me off that my parents they knew that I have an adnormal heart trends when I was small and they have kept secret from me. Now I know why I always breathing heavily everytime, they say it was minor but they wanna to further check it. Sigh....I hope it wasn't serious... But just not trying to think abt it. Yesterday had a lot of hillarious Moment happening until now I can't kept stop thinking abt it hahaha. First during the Lab test section, we suppose to piss inside a bottle in the toilet, the funny thing that we suppose to fill it to half but one of group piss until less than a quarter and he say he don't have much urine left haha. And then it was the blood test, I saw a guys with tattoo, tough body but when taking a injection he close his eyes and about to cry LOL and somes is acting like a idiot, when taking a injection, doctor suppose to collect our blood until it filled by a required bottle which is the size of the small sanitizer bottle and they argues "that my blood! That my blood you know! why you taking so much!", haha they sound like a freaky whine baby X). And when it my turns, the doctor say that compare to others, my vein is the easilest for them to find haha as my vein already pop out haha and it take me just 3 mins to finsh my blood tests haha, man went I see when they poke the needle into my vein and suck out my blood, my blood is freaky dark red haha, freaky awesome! yea! And last the unforgetful funny thing event happens that most of us can't forget it that Army Daze have it true fact is MOMMA BOY haha. Imagines most of us came there alone or with friends at the CMPB but some came with their momma or their parents and the funny things that some even have tattoos and looks like Ah bengs came with their MOMMA treating them like small Childrens hahahahahahaha WHAT a Shame! and It quite Hillarious! I thought It just a movies but actually real life really have ones! XD
Ah lot of things have happens but I am not saying that I don't have bad or embarassing moment happened to me, it just that I don't want to tell it haha :p
Yesterday I went through my file and found these, my old and first FSD training Video, I would to upload and share it with you guys on how it's doned.
This videos take based after 4 weeks of FSD training last years and I have improve so much now haha :D but it still not enough until I prove myself worthy......This videos along with me and my partner Arman.
FSD-Fits Squads
Our motto: To prove yourself worthy, To be One.
Fight for your Purposes and Fight for your Existence.
"For too long, I kept this a secret in my diary, a feeling what I really felt. Maybe it times to let it go and ease my heart from the pain, to let people know what I truly felt... This is a poetry, this is my emotions and this is what I feel in my heart everyday. I wishs I can turn back and Say it but It just can be never happen as you love someone else even deeply more.."
Title: Passionate Love
You say that you love me, But yet you left me without a clue, With a broken pain I felt in my heart, I hear myself crying without a sound.
Watching you at your pictures, It hurts to see you with him, Kiss him, Hugs him filled my minds, How could you sleep?, Walking around like I never existed, Smiling,When all I could think of you.
You used to be so fine before you changed, Like Angel fly from Venus to trap my heart, You began to keep its in the cage, As it's pumping and bleeding for you.
I know my mistakes now and I regretted it, I wished that I could turn back, And say How I truly felt for you.
I still kept the promise that I say, I willing to wait for five years, But actually what I wanna say that, I willing to wait as long as my heart still with you.
All the crushs and crushes I have, Are nothing compare to you, As the times of love I felt, Are unique from you. And I will stay, And I will find a way to come back to you. As I love you.. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yesterday was awesome, Fireworks, Parade and More firework LOL (you know what I mean right haha). I see couple and friends enjoyed themselves and getting into a mood.
This year national day is totally different, the perform was totally cool and funny haha. I like the part when the soldiers came up to the audience. My idol army's regiment are always been a sniper Op, Nice ghilles suit, and Seals, cool. I saw some of my old friends on stage and at the platform motivating the audience. They totally engaged on the mood.
And finally there a lot of pretty lady, woo-hoo :P haha Many wear tights, mini-skirt and tank-top that can alway see e-hem... haha I sound like a sick-ko but I am not ok.. Man, Sometime wishs that I can came up to them and talk to them but due to lack of confidence I can't . SHIT.... Although I able to talk to some but my friends do all the talking.... I know pathetic, well there always be next try haha...
Man, my body is freaking aching, yesterday before NDP parade, I went to the gym and now wake up, my body is killing me, well.. what "senpai" always say 'No pain, No Gain'. Well speaking of Body, some girls are impress of my body haha, Man, I gotta say thank to my senpai and my sensei for training me, if not I don't get to this far but It still not enough...
I will prove myself worthy and My existence. This is part of my personnal war, My crusades, my jihads and Independence of my Life's purposes. Haha shit, I gotta lays off of this fantasy war movies and games LOL
Poetry and Song: Wandering Ghosts [August 7, 2009]
I been thinking to make this poetry into a song because I kept having the rhymes in my head and I don't why. The weirdest thing that this words and rhymes just sudden pop out from mind. The Chinese believe that the 7th month coming. And I wanders whether it all links?... Well let fates know...
WANDERING GHOST
In dark the hollow world, He lays, With sorrow and pain in his heart, Hear nothing but figureless voices calling out to him, Muttering about death and Rage to his ears.
Feeling lost to himself, Walking alone aimlessly, Without a purpose or doubt where he's going.
In search of a light to guide him, In search of rights for his existence, Rather than being fear of himself, Frighten by his own images.
Him,thinking about what he have doned, A murderous intend he felt in his heart, Murder, Killing he all he's thinking, Wiping the world out of misery is all he wanted, And End it with a Sucidal, He regretted.
Alone now, No real voices friends or foes could comfort him, As he was blinded to everyone around him, He kept wandering to this days, Waiting for this world to end. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have my blog from friendster to Blogspot as my friends told me to. As It simpler than friendster hmm.
It been a long time I write Poetry and songs in blog or any others online journal site.
I have tons in my diary, may be I add some to this blog :) (Man, I sound like a Chick lol but who cares)
My life have like up and down lately, Maybe it time to change.
A lot of crushs and crushes sudden happened during my college days at ITE but I still don't know why I can't move one and I will tell you why.
Become a senior of my school CCA as Fitness Club Member and Rugby(Well for this one I am still a Rookie lol)
A Member of my outside social club, FSD known as Fit Squad, A group of atheltics and bodybuilders group together to share their training & diet at CCK park and Gyms. We start our training every Sundays, Wednesdays and Fridays but Since I am on attachment, I can't make it during the weekdays so I make my times training every sundays and saturdays and when free during some of the weekdays I went training at the gyms at nights. I know it pretty tiring and it torture me esp the after work-out pain but I want her to know that I existed and to prove I worthy.
Haha Now I sound emo again though how many times I say I wanna move on hmmm
My Favorite Quote is always like this: Work hard, Learn hard and never give up. Fo those who dont understand, even Sometime myself even too.
Song and Poetry: Memories of her(I Love her) [December 14, 2007]
Genre: Punk Rock and Alternative (Acoustic) Composer: Marcus Lazarus Current Status: InComplete
EveryTime, Every Moment Is a lied, MY emotion,My Pain, Is worth nothing at all
I hardly sleep, Coz I Was awakened, By Memories of you, In my head, I kept screaming to myself!(Why! God!) Why you do this to me! Playing with my heart…
I love her, I love everything about her, I know now that She don’t love me, But why I can’t stop thinking about her, The memories of Her Still kept Haunting me, Image of her can’t be erase, I can’t accept truth, That She love someone else more…
I always knew someday, She found some other guy, Who nothing like me, Cherish her with so much love, Up to her satisfaction With No hidden emotion..
I thought I should be happy for her, As She is happy with him, I kept smiling myself in the mirror without a reason, Laughing to myself, Talking to myself, It time to let go and move on, Let her be with him Coz She love him so much more…
But why I can’t forget about her! God!Why you do this to me!Help me! By not hurting me with your,Wrath of love!
I love her, I love everything about her, I know now that She don’t love me, But why I can’t stop thinking about her, The memories of Her Still kept Haunting me, Image of her can’t be erase, I can’t accept truth, That She love someone else more…
I love her, She don’t love me, But why I can’t stop thinking about her, I can’t accept truth, That She love someone else more… She love someone else…..more……
Genre: Punk Rock with rapper as a back-up Composer: Marcus Lazarus(Md Haikal) & Nazreen Shah Lazarus Chorus and Tabs doned by: Marcus Lazarus, Drafus Lazarus(Aniq Aiman) and Isham Fadly
Verse 1: Wonder around, Thinking when it happened, I am heartbroken, For once, I am feeling Lost without you, Since August 9…
Verse 2: When I see people wearing red and white everywhere, Seeing smile in their faces, Kinda Remind me of you, I still don’t know, What had just happened, I still don’t know, When did things goes wrong, When everything seen to go so well…
Chorus: You know I love you, You know I adore you, I love eveything about you, Since the day I met you, But what had happened now, If this a test,I will sure you are the best, Cause you broke my heart, And it never rest, Since August 9…
Verse 3: On that day, So does the following, I call you on the phone, (I call you) To try to say that I love you, I know It kinda pathetic,I know its lame, As I hear it ringing, But I felt it like doesn’t feel right, Cause you didn’t answer any of it anymore, And my kept myself asking why?
Verse 4: When in school, I saw you, I didn’t see the sweet smile on your face anymore, And you didn’t even turn your eyes on me, I wonder what had happened?, I wonder what been going on?.. What hell going on?
Verse 5: I asked my friend, To know the answer, But what he say to me, Had crushed me, It broke me from the insides, He said that I am a fool, I am not worth for you, He said you with another guy, I don’t know whether it true, But already tears me up…
(Chorus)
Verse 6: I feel so Unloved, I feel so much pain, And I drive myself so much hate But I still couldn’t stop thinking about you, Cause I love you so.
I feel so Unloved (You know I love you), I feel so much pain (You know I adore you), I love eveything about you,And I drive myself so much hate, But I still couldn’t stop thinking about you, Since the day I lost you,Cause I love you so…
I blamed myself for everything, For being so late…. Since August 9, Since august 9…………
Chord and Tabs: Complete execpt for drum and bass*
Song Composed: Why can't we stop pretending [October 27, 2007] *Uncompleted*
This is made by me out of some poetry that i made and song that heard, some line will needed to change and chord and tabs will be make in times(But I will not show it as My friends did want anyone to copy it,Sorry)…I know it wasn’t much, I know it pathetic and I know its lame and wat so called kental if anyone like that word but at least I try and I make it by myself….
(bridge_Keyboard)
Ahhh!….ah…. (bass)
(silent) (lead guitar + Bass)
As Time… Moving Fast, Our Love went Last, We Both know we kept something feelings from the insides, Why have to be this way, But why we keep pretending,But why we still keep pretending, Like it doesn’t really happen!…..
(drummer dash)
(chorus) My Love Is Lost, My hate are fading in, But Why can’t we be together, But Why can’t we be forever, But Why can’t we stop pretending! Why can’t We Stop!.Pretending! (ahhhh!!!) And Now Let fate decides us all!….
Sometime I cry, My tears fall onto my face, If we keep this on, I fear that you will gone from me, And that Breaks my heart,But…
I try to be strong, To prevent that to be happen, By stop pretending!, But what about you!…..
(Chorus)(bridge)
Why it have to be this way!, Why I have be so dumb!, Why I have to be so blind!, To known that you really there!, To know that you here with me..(All along!!!)
Now I am alone!!!, Without you!!
My Love Is Lost, My hate are fading in, But Why can’t we be together, But Why can’t we be forever, But Why can’t we stop pretending! Why can’t We Stop!.Pretending!!.. (x2)
(silent) (guitar tabs_lead+Bass)
And now I decides it for myself…(Self (x3)..(fade)
This isn’t Right, I can’t even Sleep at night, By thought that I can’t Deny, That I missing you so….
My friends told Me to forget and move on, But it sure ain’t gonna happen, Coz Everything about you, Is Truly everything I love about you, And now I truly miss everything about you..
I miss your Voice, That we used to talked on the phone, It Sound like you singing on the Music Tone, Now the Songs are gone from my ears, But Yet the music still remain in my Heart…
I miss your Smile, It like I seeing an angel’s Smile In a lonely Miles, But Now I feared the sight has gone from me…, As really its Breaks my heart to do.. that.., I wished that I should’nt let go my tears,Into the River of the Nile……
I miss your eyes, To me,I could see a sparkling star, As it Wandering into spaces, I could see my own pathetic face in it, But yet I could see your beautiful face in mine….
As time goes fast, This will be the last, When we meet, Let go of the bad past, The differences between us….
The four years of our lives Have been fun in our life, Sharing the mistakes even it wasn’t ours, But still it’s worth in the end….
Although Some of our friendship would’t last long together, But still…., We will be still remain tight, As if you are standing right beside us….
We may be among the most naughtiest students with teachers, But in our hearts, We appreciate what they done for us, And the memories will never be gone from us….
Our bond together, Are stronger, Like we are meant to be born together, Like brothers and sisters….
Like brothers and sisters do, Sometime we fight, Until we realise, That it wasn’t right…., That arguements will always tearing us apart…
No matter how far we go, Or where we are…., We can always remember on one thing…
We are friends before, We are friends now, We are can still be friends forever….
(This poetry is dedicate to my Classmates, My friends and My Teachers……)
Poetry and Journal(Story of my life): Confessing [September 13, 2007]
Feeling Confusing, Feeling Very Confusing, Till I hate myself, I don’t know why…..
Searching for the answers, That more than of this questions keeps screaming in my head…..
what have I done wrong to you?, what have I have to do to change?, Please give me a chance, To make this pain gone…, I just can’t take it anymore…..
Can’t you see?, My Heart torn apart at the seams, My Dream turns into tears, My Tears turn to fear, Fear that It could ever get more painer…..
Don’t you realise that, I sometime think you toying with me, When you done having your fun, You just throw me away…
Girl,If this is a game, I will give you a fame, I just wouldn’t want to be a part of it, Nor I want to be apart from you…., But I want to be part of your love, Not hate………
Please no more lie, I don’t think that my heart could take it anymore…
Please try to understand, I am not kind of guy that I can confess my feelings directly at you, I just wasn’t born that way not like others guys do, The bond between me and bad-memory of my childhood is still tight, And I just could’nt let go of it…
I wished sometime my family could understand me too…..
Poetry and Journal of my Feelings: I don't care but still I Care [June 18, 2007]
I can’t take this anymore….,
I don’t care that I will break these holy wall that separate me from you, I just want to see your beautiful face instead your smile, But still…..that means nothing to me….
I want to see your heart through me…., Just to know that you love me too…..
I don’t care that will get me a thousand sin that bring me straight to hell…, Rather than feeling a poison sharp pin pressing through my heart…, Feeling the pain that I can’t really bear any longer……, Slowly dying without a drop of tear fall…..
I don’t care whether it right or wrong to break this promises that had done.., As long as I am staying right with you…, It better be gone than being a loss sight of you…..
I don’t care, I don’t feels scare.., That I will be burn in the hellish fire of hell, For the crime that I didn’t undone….
But what frightening me most, Is that I being pull back from you, Being chain to the wall…, As I watching you slowly fading without a single word to say to you…..
I simply don’t care for just about anything that separate me from you.., Cause you lighten my soul even how dark it was…., You put happiness even when I am down that I can’t be up…..
Even you wasn’t there, By just a little thought of you, Draw me a little smile of you…
But one thing I care…., But one thing that kept me holding back from you.., Is you from me…., I wanna know if you have the same feeling as I do……
I wanna know if you accept me….
And I just really wanna know that do you really love me………….
Poetry and Journal: Too Much Care, Pay a Thousand Fares [June 7, 2007]
I don’t care what you do, I don’t care what you trying to say……………… But What I care "is you", I care for your pain, I care for your gain of happiness……….. I care for your laughter of joy, I care for your sickness of hurt that make me worry………… I know everyone has their own flaws while I have my own claws….., To climb my way up of this broken hole of this world, So that I could smell fresh air of this whole universe before I gone………. But I have no strength to do it so…… But now,I realise too much care, make me pay a thousand fares before I reach you………. And now I will stop just for you……… But I had one question, only for you…… "Do you care for me???" (This Poetry is ask by sumone for tribute to his speacial sumone someday)
As the Moon moves to the centre of the sky, Street Began to walks in silent, Trees began to whisper to the wind…. And Melody began to appear, From the children of the city….
As they sang gracefully, To the brightest stars in the sky… Theirs sorrow sank to the bottom of their hearts, Happiness is what remains in them.
They wished they could soar up into the night sky, Playing with the stars, And resting in the moon, As they wanted it would be….
Forget the painful past they had, And starts creating a brighter future for them….
As they would remember that these is a night as "A Glistening Memories of the Night".
You know I am always there, You know I always care, Watching your heart move on, I don’t think i can stay strong, My world falling beneath me, Why can’t you see? Your happiness is torture me…, My mind a broken sculpture, I need to walk away now, Before my pain kills me somehow, You’ll still remain in my heart, Because you were there right from the start, Wiping away my tears, The tears i cried on them rainy days, I am now dying my love just for you….
It be 2 years i had falling my love for her, But till i had not express my feelings yet It not easy than i thought… At first i had a courage, then i had nothing like it seen to disappear out of thin air I can’t even dare to talk to her face to face, afraid that i make a wrong move I always felt that i am losing my mind and kept thinking that "she’s ways out of my league" I tried to be someone else but nothing seen to change, like this is who I really am… ( a geek, a nerd, a loser) sometimes i stared myself in the mirror and started became insane about this fucking Feelings I wished that if i just took it out and bury it or burns it better before i get more hurt and kept suffering like this… Sometime i hate myself for being like this…. Everytime i looked at her beautiful dazzling eyes, I felt coldest through my vein and blood around my body started ran quickly through my body…and then i began to lost through the blank… I finally reaslised that if i kept going like this, i will lose my mind and hope to the burning rage of flames, burns me up till its left me wit nothing left So……………….I kept going with my life by stopping thinking abt it/her. Eventually then, I found out She had found someone else….. Since then I felt empty from inside…… I thought I gives her time to think abt it……I wished i could tell her sooner how i REALLY feel inside…. but it seemed was too late….. One day after a few weeks later, i was introduced by the words "EMO"…. I learn wat does its means and i finally understand its. It feels like I and emo had a lot of connection together.. I Tried to one of them to feels, learn how its really like till i really became a fully EMO EM0/BR
